What Goes Around…

…Comes Around. Always been a firm believer in that. Kharma (in a simple form-not with all the religious garb) has it’s way of working things out. A year ago my life was so much different. It was a struggling time for me. I was in fear of the person that I loved taking away the loves of my life. I couldn’t breathe. There seemed to be challenges at every angle and I often had to face them alone. I was scared and hurt, yet still determined to find happiness through it all. I know I had lots of prayer on my side and couldn’t have made it otherwise. This wasn’t the path that I chose but the one I vowed to make work for my children.

After my seperation/divorce, I became the typical cynic. Fairytales were just that, tales. True love didn’t exist. No romance movies, they were stupid and unrealistic. Men don’t really act like that!

I admit, I was completely wrong! The past 7 months have been like no other. I have lived, laughed and loved more than I ever have in all my 28 years. Bradley is my knight in shining armour, my prince charming, and my soul mate. All things that I thought were mystical and quite frankly, gibberish.

For the first time in my adult life, I have a man that treats me with immeasurable respect, love and consideration. And above all that, he does the same for my children as he does his own. I look forward to coming home to his smiling face everyday without fail. Not a day goes by that I don’t want to be near him and with him. Not a day goes by that I don’t thank God for helping me find him. As cheesy and trite as it may sound, he was made for me.

Telling Bradley I love him seems so hollow to me. The simple word, love, cannot encompass the depth of feelings I have for him. The ‘L’ word is thrown around so easily, so freely. It seems so big and so strong when it isn’t love. When it truly is, it sounds so weightless and used up.

I have loved before, deeply, unconditionally. But when that love is finally returned at the same magnitude, it explodes and oozes through every part of your life. Don’t make the same mistakes I have. Don’t love someone else at the cost of yourself; to give so much of you that there is nothing left. It isn’t true love. But true love, it returns itself ten-fold. It’s simple, it’s not hard to love or to be loved. Daily struggles and the waves of life are what you work on, the love comes easy.

I hope everyone that says they love someone else, feels the same passion, the same fulfillment. I pray that everyone has the chance and opportunity to find the one that compliments them so easily and completely. And remember that whole kharma thing? If you do what is right, honest and good…it will come back around. The hardships of life may be painful and hard (and often lonely) for a little while. But stay true to yourself and to your values. I did my best and as a result I found my Bradley and he found me.

Remember how God defined love. It is the way He loves and the way we should love….

I Corinthians 13:4-8

Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.

Love never fails.

Written: July 29, 2008

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